Its funny how low levels of sustained annoyance or anxiety can slowly but surely build up over time. Just like a jog filling up from a constant drip drip. I have had a few instances in recent times, where I was letting stress slowly build up, without addressing the issue(s) at hand, often using my ‘work’ as a convenient distraction from getting down to the crux of the problem once and for all.
In two separate instances, I have felt this tension building, and looking back now, it feels as if they were two slightly separate types of situation, despite the outcome of both being eventually getting run-down, sick, or injured.
The first situation was a gradual build up of things on my ‘to-do’ list. A mixture of things that were actually important and had a bit of genuine urgency to them, and a whole pile of things that for one reason or another found themselves on my list of things to do but were not really that important, could be delegated, or could wait for a later time. Everyday, another few things onto the list.
The second type of situation is the kind that is more of a long term proposition. Not a constant build up of small things but just a bigger type of situation that is less-than-ideal, and just sits there like a big elephant on my chest.
Different situations, similar results. Less sleep, more of being anxious during the day, not being able to enjoy the down-time, over-thinking, not eating as well, not drinking enough water, less reading for pleasure or for learning, not training/ moving as much as I would like, and crucially, less curiosity. All of the above simply resulted in my being out of work sick for a week, and whether coincidence or not, the resurrection of a sore back.
So what to do?
Of course, I realised what worked best for me before my total demise, all-be-it that I was out sick for a week, and another few weeks of building up to that point. What came to mind was that simply accepting the way that things were, was a great starting point for me to be able to deal with the things that I had on my plate. I found that by accepting that things were as they were allowed me to drop my underlying sense of denial, get my head out of the sand, stop feeling so guilty about not taking care of my shit, and really opened up the door for getting started on some helpful solutions. It was like a pressure release valve for stress and tension, and a weight lifted off my shoulders.
Regarding my long list of low-level, small tasks, I focused on prioritising the most important ones, got to work on them, scheduled time to complete the necessary ones, and either delegated or wrote off the rest.
In respect to the bigger more long-term stress, I felt like accepting the way things were, making changes in the right direction, while letting the problem sit there, and keeping the faith that small steps in the right direction would eventually dissolve the problem, was a great relief and more positive mindset than simply getting worked up about it. This approach has worked for me successfully when it came to cleaning off loans, setting up big projects such as my personal training business ACLAÍ, relationships, and living arrangements.
A recent example that I have in my head is a tattoo that I recently got, that I was not happy with from fairly shortly after I got it. I went for 6 months without wearing a short sleeve t-shirt in public, as I didn’t want to have to chat about the unfinished ink on my arm with anyone. I became quite self conscious about it over time. However, one day I was in for a hair cut and was wearing long sleeve shirt. I cycled down on what was quite a warm day, and actually now that I think about it, it was the week before I was off sick. I was sweating buckets in the barber shop, and decided there and then that wearing long sleeve t-shirts was not a great idea when the weather was warm. Anyway, who cares what I have on my arm? And to anyone who does care, why would I care that they care?!
That was the moment I accepted that it was what it was. After the fresh hair cut, I bought a few t-shirts, and started making plans to get my arm sorted out. But in the meantime, I was going to wear a t-shirt whenever I felt like it!
In my line of work as a strength and conditioning coach, I encounter people on a weekly basis, who would rather have less body-fat, more muscle, stronger, or more flexible. Everyone has their goals, and everyone is entitled to work towards whatever personal goal that they choose. Our work win ACLAÍ is to support our members goals with our training, coaching, and nutrition support, which we do with all we have in the tank. However, we also encourage our members to be happy with themselves today, and not wait for the goals to be achieved before they start to feel happy.
I say to myself, “Be happy today, right now. Work towards goals by all means, and pursue your dreams, but accept that things are how they are and move in the right direction. You never know what is around the corner!”
